saskatoon

Went to S'toon today, had to see the eye doctor AGAIN (only 3-6 more times this year). Didn't really help boost my spirits much. I'm not a big fan of eye appointments, never have been, and I know my parents are really having trouble letting me handle them myself, my mom just naturally gravitates into the exam room with me. I know she just cares, she's worried, she wants to know what's happening, she's supported me this far and wants to finish this novel of my eyecare that started 24 years ago, but sometimes I'd like to be able to talk to a doctor one on one. I son't know, I do like her being there, but sometimes I feel like I'm still 12.

Thought alot today about life, about how terrible I felt last night, about this year and how hard it's been. I don't know the answers. I know I do have good days. This Saturday was alot of fun, and like I said yesterday, it's been my friends and family that have really buoyed me up (and continue to do so thanks Danny, Rhonda, Dave, Anonymous (Corey maybe?) and my arch-nemesis/best friend, Michelle). I dunno. I just really feel like shit lately. I'm gonna try and look ahead here, I've got a whole 7 more months of 2006 to look forward to. A long summer, reunion of one of my favourite bands I've played in, well paying job and God only knows what else. Does this mean I'm gonna be happy? Nope, hell I'm depressed just writing this, but I do want to try, I think I'm gonna have to find some help with it is all.