... that hasn't happened since I bet aught-six (dag nabit).
Tonight's topic : Women (dag nabit)
Fuck you
Ok you ladies think you got it so hard? You got it EASY ladies. I mean PURSES? How can you NOT be leaders of the world? If men weren't socially shunned for carrying purses we would have conquered Mars by now.
Oh sure metrosexuals have them. Ever see a metrosexual with a bad job? Exactly.
In this day and age of cellphones and iPods and large plastic car keys and wallets and digital cameras and GPS's and perscription eyewear and lighters and bill sizes as coins and.... so on... one is struggling to survive under this weight straining pockets made smaller and smaller by tightwad box stores who prey on your class because they know your style and your budget. Even with the introduction of the Cargo pant, typically the least used items end up in your knee level pocket and those are usually heavy things like digital cameras and that's a pain in the ass itself. Winter offers some solstace, large winter parkas offer endless pockets inside and out to hide treasures in. But here comes summer. Here comes my backpack.
Yeah you don't win them all ladies. I know. I know. But look I tell you what, I'll give you some advice (and compliment you too). You ladies should be running this world. You really should. You're organized enough, you're kind enough and you're just enough to make this world work right. People would not suffer as they do, and we would stop hurting and killing each other and our planet. I'm sure. So waddya say ladies? Ready to take the leap?
I'm not kind.
ReplyDeleteFuck everyone. :)
My purse really doesn't have the keys to world domination, although I can carry a piece of fruit in it for MONTHS and not realize it. That says something you'd think.
ReplyDeleteOk, if women were the leaders of the world they'd nuke a place once a month.
ReplyDelete"I've got an aunt like that." - Moss
ReplyDeleteI'M TRYING to run the world, but the man keeps trying to bring me down.
BTW nice metaphoring but I seriously did just buy a grown-up purse last week. I needed something big enough to fit my lunch as I take public transit to my place of employment.
There's always the 'murse' if you're a metrosexual... or for the rest of us, there's the good old fashion satchel... just looks like you're carrying important papers or something, when really you have a whole arsenal of useful things.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure women are right to run the world just yet. You want to try a fun experiment. When you see a group of women sitting somewhere like for coffee. Put a single piece of cheesecake in front of them and then WATCH OUT! Thats more violent then whatever new video game the kids are playing today. MarioKart maybe.
ReplyDeleteI've been accused of carrying a purse. It was a bag with stuff in it, ok?
ReplyDelete