Results-driven Elmer Fudd

Many, many years ago, my youngest sister, Shanna (Soulfood), had a little rabbit named George. George had all black fur and was very small. Like very, very small. I don't know if he was some breed of dwarf rabbit or what, but he was always able to fit in the palm of my hand. 

Shanna always wanted a rabbit, so there was some delight when she finally got one. But at the same time, I don't know that she was in a position to care for an animal yet. At the same time, she was about 15 when she got George, so also just a teenager. And who cares about anything when you're a teenager? 

And so it fell to me on occasion to look after the little guy. Not that this was much of a lift, feed him, clean out his cage, play with him once in a while. One day, while I was playing with ol' George, Mom instructed me to go give that rabbit a bath. 

I recall even saying then, "Do rabbits need baths?" My thought was maybe they're self-cleaning. Like a cat. Or the oven. 

But mom insisted so dutifully, I proceeded. I took George to the sink, put in some water and gave him a gentle scrub. After that, I wiped him off, put a towel in the bottom of the bathtub and let George run around a bit in there to get totally dry - rather than put him back in his cage where his wet fur would just get clogged with woodchips. 

I left for a moment to do something and, upon return, found ol' George dead as a doornail.

It was pretty upsetting. I mentioned it in a discussion with Kayah last week that I haven't faced death that often. Since then, I've said goodbye to a couple of dogs and many fish. But up to that point, it had only been some distant or very old relatives. I'd never stared death in the face. 

Fast forward 25 years to Sunday night (Monday morning?), and I was driving south on Highway 2 on the way home from a gig in Prince Albert. I had just passed the turnoff to Penzance when a streak dashed from the ditch to the left of me and directly under my bumper. The last I would see was two tall rabbit ears before a sickening THUMP. 

Pilot's rabbit bodycount: 2. 

Talk about taking the joy out of a good night. Luckily, the car wasn't damaged, but that poor rabbit is now another mess of roadkill on the side of the road. 

I'm not so sure why Elmer Fudd found rabbit hunting so far. I've taken two down without too much effort, and in my part of the world, you can walk within a couple of feet of a rabbit. I guess it speaks to the skill and intelligence of Bugs Bunny that he was able to survive so many run-ins.  But I do think ol' Elmer may need some guidance from an experienced hunter. 

Because if I were in a survival situation, I'd be eating rabbit. 

Be Prepared

 I spent 9 years of my youth in one of the various Boy Scouts of Canada clubs. Beaver, Cubs, Scouts. Aside from never really getting my knots down, I enjoyed the experience. Sometimes I wish I still had my Scout book. Maybe I'll find one at a thrift store sometime. 

The Scouts have a motto: Be Prepared. Now, that motto talks a lot about duty, and I think duty and responsibility are important parts of being prepared. But I've always felt that being prepared was a lot about being ready to respond to a large range of scenarios. You could be useful, but also life-saving. 

The motto seeps into a lot of my life. My everyday carry is a pocket knife, phone and a lighter. They're pretty useful a lot of the time, and they prepare me for a number of emergent situations as well. 

The backpack I take to work is even worse. Pens, a flashlight, a fingernail multitool, a cloth, a notepad, an umbrella and at any given time, typically some coffee, water and food. I'm prepared for an awful lot. Add to that dressing in layers and with some foresight, and I get through quite a large swath of life. 

Enter, last Thursday and a kinda nasty rain/windstorm by local standards. The forecast was calling for some really rough weather. In a first for me, the forecast even said that there was a possibility that utilities could be affected. 

The morning dawned reasonably mild, but it had that wet quality to it that reminded me I should bring my raincoat. We were commenting on the deteriorating weather at every morning meeting, and no sooner had my final meeting in the afternoon ended than the power went out. 

I kept busy for a bit, did my notebook, wrote some emails, and tidied up my desk. But everyone around me was getting more and more worried. The office soon started clearing out. Since I'm just recovering from my most recent gout attack, I opted to stick around until the power came back and avoid taking 18 flights of stairs to street level. Then the evacuation alarm went off. 

So, I grabbed my coat, my backpack, and I headed down the stairs. We were corralled out to the parking lot across the street, out in the rain and wind. Then the instruction came, "If you can get home without re-entering the building or parkade, you're dismissed for the day."

There was some real math here for me. 1 mile walk home, about a 1/2 mile walk to the bus, but there's an even-odd chance that it never shows up because the wind is so bad they're taking them off the road. I chose to take the walk home. The power was out, so there was no light at Albert and Saskatchewan Drive - a dangerous intersection at the best of times. Then just uphill on Albert, into the wind on Dewdney, and I was home - completely exhausted. 

I had been prepared with the right clothing and good shoes. But I was very, very exhausted. I'm out of shape from that gout attack, and I was barely able to navigate that particular situation.

This has brought to mind that old adage of "Be Prepared". Police cam YouTuber, Sergeant Curtis, always talks about officers being in the right shape for the fight of their lives. While I don't know that I'd typically hold my office-job having butt to the standard of a police officer, I do work in an 18th-floor office. Yes, I'm coming off a health issue, but I could be working harder to train up to recover and be better prepared to navigate a scenario like that in the future. 

Because my God, my whole body hurts.

Time to do some cleanup

I sat down to write this post without a good idea in mind. I actually had a beautiful diatribe in mind on Friday night, but I didn't write any of it down, so now I don't have anything. 

I went into my drafts on Blogger to see what I could maybe work with. 39 draft stories. Some are interesting ideas. Some are just cringe. Let's try to knock a few off the list!

US Election
Nov 4, 2008

 

Well it's so historic, so I'd better blog.

The real history here isn't colour or race or age. It's the end of the Nixon era finally coming to fruition. Today will be seen as the day the United States decided to change how it runs itself and how the world sees it.

Make no mistake, the world begins to change tommorrow.

 

Oh, my dear boy. You have no idea. One word - birtherism. You'll look back on the Bush era with fondness.

Defund the CBC?
Oct 10, 2010

I've been kinda toying with this idea for a while, but never found myself in a conclusive place. My argument is that we should be taking the money going to the CBC and spreading it across all independent media. I also think that the harm the Online News Act did to Canadian media, they could be offset by the boost from the government. 

Benn Jordan has some really good arguments and ideas about eliminating copyright and changing how media is paid for. I think big systemic shifts are needed to keep our news, media, art and entertainment solvent. 

What a Storm!

Aug 8, 2007

Well, you didn't write anything at all in this one bonehead, so we only know from the title that it was a big storm. I dunno, I looked it up, and we only got a half centimetre of rain. And you didn't even write a post. Not that great of a storm. 

Magic 103.5 FM is the coolest radio station on the freaking planet.

Jan 20, 2007

Ok folks, so Wednesday hit me with some great news. The contest for free Tragically Hip tickets that I had gotten into the day before, scored me a free pair of tickets for the show last night. So off i went to check out the show with the lil' lady.

How about some video of the show for your guys.

Yup, that was a good show. Kinda surprised I didn't finish this one. You can watch the video here! 

Fun story, while we were finding our seats, we crossed paths with the then Premier of Saskatchewan, Lorne Calvert. And to my shock and awe, Rhonda turned to His Eminence and struck up a conversation. I would later learn that she had known him since she was a kid, and her mom worked for him. She never introduced me, and I've never let her live it down. 

Leaving the Masterpiece Unfinished
Dec 23, 2004

I recently finished reading the Dark Tower series by Stephen King. The first three books were amazing, and frankly I feel some of his best writing. The last four books of the series were crap. I also recently acquired access to the Star Wars SPecial Edition Trilogy. Again, what the hell was Lucas thinking... hell what's he thinking with the prequels for that matter. It just seems that once someone creates something cool, they can't leave it alone to be judged for what it is, or they try so hard to "finish" it that it turns to crap. Maybe Chaucer didn't finish the Canterbury Tales because all he was getting were dumb ideas involving a goat. Does anyone want to sit through another hour of Lord of the Rings:Return of the King?

Poor guy. Doesn't know about Rise of Skywalker yet. Or P. Diddy. 

There was another draft in the list that was just a link to clone-high.com. Doesn't work, but it's still owned by Chorus Entertainment according to WHOIS. Talk about masterpieces left unfinished. 

Picasso's Deli
October 6, 2005

It was a little deli in the old Co-op building in downtown Weyburn. They made a great pastrami on rye, and I ate a lot of sandwiches and soup from that place for a couple of years. Doesn't look like it's still around. 

"This is the Real Issue"
Mar 21, 2008

Chris Crocker ladies and gentlemen,

I had absolutely no idea what any of this was at first. I had to Google it. Known today as Cara Cunningham, they're famous for the "Leave Britney Alone!" video. Considering the life we've seen Briney Spears navigate in the years since, she was lucky to have someone like Cara raising the alarm. 

I'm Hardcore 
Dec 27, 2004

No, you're not. And some of the shit you're going to see and experience in the next year is going to really highlight that. 

You never do get that hardcore. But you're a punk.

Tape
Jan 30, 2026

Masking

Scotch

Packing 

Duct

Electric

Gaffer

Fruit by the foot

Audio tape and video tape

Yep, it was a bit slow in January. You just about got a 2-page list of all the kinds of tape I could think of. Also missing: aluminum, paper, butcher, measure, worm, bubble gum and crime scene.

Well, that took the number of old drafts down to 27. And there are a couple in there that I'm going to build out to full articles yet. I also deleted a couple that were kind of literally nothing. What kind of tape should I add to the list? Do you remember Picasso's Deli? What unfinished masterpiece is your favourite?

Just a pickle in a jar

Probably as a result of my understandable fascination with the recent success of the Artemis II mission, the ol' YouTube algorithm has me back on some Scott Manley lately, and I've been watching some of his old videos. 

One that I'd seen before but sat through again was an episode where he gets to put his head and a camera into a 7K-0K Soyuz descent module. Absolutely soaking in Scott Manley's nerdom, you really quickly learn just how tiny it is in one of those capsules. And you're typically crammed in there with 2 other people. Yeowtch.

The earlier Vostok - and even Mercury - capsules were even smaller. 

Yikes

It's reminiscent of the people who would seal themselves in a barrel to be thrown over Niagara Falls. Just get put in a giant quart sealer, strap yourself to tonnes of explosions and light 'er up. It's shocking more people haven't died. 

But the concept seems to work well. Sealed capsules still seem to be the safest and most efficient way to travel - especially when returning to Earth. The Space Shuttle looks comfortable, but it had a less-than-ideal track record. 

Humans really do seem to have a penchant for canning themselves up and doing something stupid. David Blaine even included brine in one of his sealing projects. Stockton Rush killed $2.6 billion dollars in people when his pickle jar imploded. 

I don't consider myself particularly claustrophobic. I ride elevators comfortably and could hang out in a shed for hours. But the idea of being sealed inside a vessel with danger outside is a bit off-putting to me. Maybe it isn't the capsule, it's the close proximity to the danger that the shell is protecting me from. But again - I drive and fly in comfort, and those conveyances do the same. 

So all that to say. I would like to build a barrel with YouTube to protect me from work. And the kids. 

No Grift Sherlock

Well, leave it to George Strombolopolous to live me a big old kick in the feels again. Actually he's been doing it pretty regular lately, his YouTube really is a great stop for that modern philosopher that's hard to buy for. 

This time he was talking about getting a Sherlock Holmes collection from his uncle. This has a particular resonance for me because I got my Sherlock start through a collection my Aunty Vickie got me. Touche. 

He makes some.great points about how Holmes is an antithesis to modern life. He would sit for hours examining the same thing - see what others miss. Something that's hard to do.in our screen bathed and information soaked world. 

But Holmes really feels like it should be required reading these days. The stories show real logic, reasoning, observation and memory. I think we could all learn a lot from Holmes. 

But I think we can learn a bit from George too. I dont spend enough time reading and even less time reading fiction. I think.thats going to be something I'm going to start.doing more of. 

I've spent much of my adult life thinking I'd put off getting a good book reading lamp for by my bed. Maybe I take some of this cash I'm making and get me a good light. Go to.the used book store and stick my hand in the random bin. Or go to the library! 

What's the Magic Word?

Like much of the prairies, we got a very heavy late winter/early spring snow dump last week. It was about 10-12 inches of snow over about a 36-hour period. Somehow, even though it had only been a couple of weeks since we had snow, the bus drivers in town had already forgotten how to drive in snow. 

As a result, Friday morning found me standing on an unshovelled sidewalk waiting with three others for a bus that didn't come. As we waited the 25 minutes for the next bus, I got into a conversation with one of the guys I often say hello to in the mornings, waiting for the bus. 

Somehow, the conversation got into the history of contract law and how often we accept agreements without even scanning the document we're about to agree to. My conversation mate commented at one point that he thought that words were magic. They can affect your life, change how you behave, and some people build amazing power using words. 

I found myself agreeing pretty strongly with this sentiment. As a professional writer and songwriter, I've perhaps codified and systematized using words so it doesn't seem as magic to me as just advanced use of human technology. As Arthur C. Clarke put it, "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic." I think we're looking at a version of this here. 

Using words and other communication methods to influence how someone behaves is at the core of the work I do in public relations. Maybe we call it a "call to action" or "intended behaviour," but we could as easily call it "the spell we cast upon the public". Saruman in The Lord of the Rings and Count Dooku in Star Wars are both famous characters who could influence what people do just by talking. Maybe it's no coincidence that both characters were played by Christopher Lee. He could talk me into anything. 

But there is another element that, while we do talk about it in PR, we don't put as much emphasis on. The ability to make people feel a certain way. I didn't talk about it with my fellow bus rider, but I have discussed it with my career coach and with my sister over the last year. The ability to make people feel a certain way. Certainly, the reader of this blog experiences it every week - the ability of my words to illicit deep, lasting boredom. 

As a songwriter and musician, I see how music can be a major upgrade too. 

As my sister and I prepared the music for our grandma's internment last summer, we quickly decided that we were going to make them cry. Not provide some nice sad music. We were going to use our skills, the work of musicians before us and the history of the person we were honouring to make them cry. Magic? Maybe to some. But we knew how to wield it. 

I've delved deeper into it with my career coach, who did an excellent job of reminding me that not only is it a power I can wield, but, done responsibly, many people want me to. People want to be made to laugh, to think, and even, yes, at times, cry. And I suppose that's where we get into the arts and their ability to add something more than stuff or information to the world. We add emotion - we use our magic to bring intangible beauty to the world. 

What do you think? Are words magic? Is music, sculpture, painting, dance or any of the other arts magic too? Does the magic get a boost by being combined? Is there a human technology that seems magic to you? 

Dog-a-betes

 I shared a bit about it in the family group chat and on Instagram, but that's not my blog, so I need to reshare here.

We found out this weekend that Liberty, our Border Collie-Pyrenees mix dog, has diabetes. Looking back, of course, the signs have been there for a while. He's been losing weight, has an insatiable thirst and an ability to pee like no creature I've ever experienced. 

We finally took him in on Friday when it was clear that the weight loss was very serious. The diagnosis was pretty quick, and we spent the weekend taking him back and forth to the vet. They monitored him during the day, and we had him at home to rest and feel comfortable again. 

He's been a total champ. He's less concerned with all the needles than I am. Because I am a wuss with a severe needle phobia. But I guess now I need to face that fear because I'll occasionally need to give the boy the shot. It's against my Hippocratic oath to do no harm - the needle will create a small puncture wound - but I suppose it's worth it to give this guy a long, complete life. 

Of course, this comes with a lot of learning about diabetes for me. How insulin works, what a ketone is and how it is that a dog who's 7 years old, who's had a pretty consistent diet and exercise, could relatively suddenly develop this. 

One of the things I found reading about canine diabetes is that it's usually found in middle-aged dogs, so check on that one. It also usually stays dormant and can be triggered by becoming overweight. We were certainly commenting this past fall that he was getting chonky, and we should probably start getting him on a diet. Check two. 

So yeah. We now have our own Wilford Brimley of dogs. Delightful. 

Was glad to have the old boy home between visits. He even got a chance to help his sister change the blower motor on her car on Saturday night. 

From cat, to dog, to people. We were all very happy to have him home and to know what's up with the poor boy. 

Fly me to the moon

Yesterday, as I toiled away in the word mines of our government, four people broke a long-standing record and became the farthest humans away from earth ever. 

Seems lonely. 

Yes, the Artemis II mission (or more specifically the Orion space capsule) made its lap around the far side of the moon yesterday and broke the old record set by the ill-fated Apollo 13 mission back in 1970. 

The crew was the very picture of diversity. They had a tall person, a short person. A boy person and a girl person. A black person and ... a Canadian. Personally, I think the only reason they didn't have a paraplegic person on board was that the rest of the astronauts would be embarrassed by how well someone who uses their hands to get around would perform. Make them all look bad. 

But I think Canada has been getting shortchanged here. 

"What are you talking about Pilot, Hansen is the first non-American to leave low-Earth orbit."

Sure, yes. We're all very grateful for that. But like. 

Why don't we get a cool name for our space-farers?

Chinese space-travellers are called Taikonauts. Those who have left Earth from Russia/USSR have been called Cosmonauts. I even found that France has their own name for zero-g wanderers: spationaut. 

So why can't Canadians have our own cool name? I mean, we have an entire astronaut corps, and we've sent 9 people to space a total of 17 times.  

Well, as with anything in this world, and consistent with this blog far overstepping it's reach in trying to change the world, I've got a proposal.

Espanaut. 

Reflecting Canada's bilinguality I grabbed the French word for space, "espace," which really has the English word for space in there as well. "Space". 

I also considered Siderialnaut, because Siderial comes from Latin but also is a word still used in English and French. But sidereal more describes the stars and really deep space. Maybe we can use that one when we send the first Canadian to Wolf 359. 

Maybe it's all a wasted discussion, though. Once the Cheeto Benito goes through with his annexation of Canada, they'll all become astronauts again anyway.  

On a separate note, but still involving Canada and space, a comedian at open mic last night pointed out that the entire Apollo program and 50-year absence from the moon have happened since the last time that the Toronto Maple Leafs won the Stanley Cup. They won it in 1967, the first trip around the moon was 1968, the first landing in 1969 and the last mission in 1972. And we just flew past again now in 2026. 

The crux of the joke was that Jeremy Hansen was given the chance to either join a Stanley Cup-winning Toronto Maple Leafs or to be the first Canadian to go to the moon, and he decided to go with the one that had an actual chance of happening. 

Oof. 

Pot-purry

A bit more of a scrambled post today, but hey, sometimes that's how it do be.

I spent a few hours on Sunday night painting a garden gnome sculpture that Tai gave me for Christmas. It had been broken during its delivery, so I had to glue it up a few weeks ago, and this weekend was my time to shine and get some colour on it. 

I think he's pretty cute. I'm going to make a little mushroom to add to his grass stand, too. 

Ahsoka seems to have hurt her paw on Friday during our walk. I'm not entirely sure what she did to hurt it, maybe just a twist of an ankle or something. Or maybe she stepped on something, it's recently snowed - again- so there could have been something hidden. We didn't find anything in her paw, so that's good. And she seems to be recovering nicely. 

I spent some time last night with her enormous rope, just playing some light tug and walking her back and forth in the kitchen. No limps, thank goodness. I'll try her on the normal walk tonight. 

I'm headed into the studio this weekend! It's the first time in about 15 years that I've been in a music studio. Obviously, spent a lot of time in a radio studio from 2015-2020 and was back in one in January when I did a promo for my show. 

It's also the first time going into the studio solo, first time as a lead vocalist, first time as a guitarist and maybe the first time in the whole province with a kazoo. I think the engineer is kinda nervous about that last part! 

I said from the start of Jeremy and his Kazoo that the project would be live performance first and that I'd look at recording once the demand started to appear. Well, it's appeared. I've had lots of asks for Trevor's Tincture and Beef Dylan in particular. I'm going to throw American Kazoo on the pile and go in to record three songs. I actually probably have the budget to do 5 songs, but I think I'm gonna stop at 3, make a plan to get those out, get some buzz and possibly money flowing from those and then do some more recording another time. I don't need to act like it's 1995 and there's a specific path I need to take as a musician. I just need some recordings that I can send people to if they like what I'm doing. 

So yeah - that's what's up in Pilot's World these days. Been playing every open mic I can find to try and sharpen my performance up more, practice up some of the new songs I wrote in February. Hoping that the weather gets better soon, but not betting on it. 

Journal-tism

One of the early motivators in doing Pilot's World was to have a journal of my life to share. Not just with people today, but also for my kids and other descendants. I think many generations will enjoy reading this blog and wondering just what was wrong with me.

But as my job coach pointed out a few months ago, people can have many different journals that do different things. So there's this blog that's a public journal, I have my work journals, and I have a private journal that's more for my mental and physical health. 

My work journals are one of my more successful journaling endeavours outside of Pilot's World. I've been keeping a daily to-do/notes journal at work since about 2015, with the journals you see above going back to December of 2016. There was another book before the #1 book you see there, but it was on an old cheap notepad and was frankly more of a scratch pad than it was a journal. 

I started this set of journals after taking one of those productivity seminars they have you do occasionally at corporate jobs. I think it might have been 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. But maybe it wasn't. All I remember is the suggestion that you take the last 10-15 minutes of every day and lay out the next day for yourself in a journal.  

And boy, have I done that. For 10 years now, I've done that. I've also taken endless notes in endless meetings, drawn little sketches and kept every apple, orange or fruit sticker from every snack I've brought to work in that time. 

There are some pivotal moments in these journals, too, like the day we got sent home from The Pandemic. Interestingly, that page was written the same day as the one post I did on Pilot's World between 2012 and 2024. 

Or even some history that wasn't put down with a pen. Like this journal that was chewed up by a baby Ahsoka. 

I'm nearly at the end of book 14, and I've really only got 5 or 6 more blank books before I run out. Dollarama stopped stocking this kind of notebook, so sometime in the next 3-5 years, I need to find another job or completely pivot on what kind of notebook I use for this! 

Which brings me to my personal journal and the conflict I'm feeling right now. It started up about a year ago in response to a couple of things. First, Rhonda suggested I start keeping track of some of my health stuff, like when my gout starts to act up or if I'm having issues with my eyes. Likewise, my counsellors have suggested doing the same for my mental health, so I combined them into a single Google Docs document. 

For a while there, I was doing a post every morning, just sat down with my voice-to-text and blurted it all out. But as you can see in the screenshot above, this particular journal has started to lose its charm for me. I dunno. I don't necessarily feel the need to sit down and complain about life for 10 minutes every morning. And I don't go back much. It's just not fulfilling.

So I'm torn. I do like doing some journaling every day, but I'd like it to be more creative. More drawings, lyrics, ideas. Sure, I'll still have some griping or recording my glaucoma pressures. But it should be more. 

And while I appreciate the speed and versatility of doing this digitally, I dunno. Maybe I need to move my personal blog back onto notebooks. It's not as accessible to me, and it's MUCH slower. But having a decade of notebooks with such a variety of materials is pretty cool to have, too. And to look back on.  

So, what's the endgame of this whole journaling-related dump? Well, it's time for a change, this much I know. And I'm in a good position, both in my experience and in my desire, to make something cool. I might look into some kind of journaling service or try to make better use of the tools I have. Blogger clearly shows me that I can combine text, photos, drawings, video and more, which is very useful. I could build a private blog. Or I could just suck it up and start journaling in my old document again. 

I think there might be some use in trying to do it at a different time of day, too. Maybe I'm just too crabby to be doing it first thing in the morning. 

So yeah - a journal entry on journaling. Been trying to work through this lately and rediscover a passion for this personal journal because I think there can be some use for it. I do so much writing, creating and scratching. I need to make it something I enjoy every day. Do you journal? What's your favourite way to go about it?